Dec 19, 2008

Exotica

Just over a week ago, I was in Banff for a work conference/workshop thing (yes, I know, life is terribly tough isn’t it?) and on the second night that we were there, we were taken out to one of the local restaurants for dinner.

We were told where we were going, some place called Grizzly’s. Now I had heard of this place once before when we were in Banff. On that occasion, I was there with the family and we were looking for a restaurant that we’d been to on a previous visit, one where we could have fondue. It happened to be closed for renovations and so enquires were made about other options that would enable us to have a fondue dinner.

The name Grizzly’s came up. I overheard another group talking about it at that time and telling how there were phones at every table so that guests could ring each other … because it was a swinger’s place. We decided to eat elsewhere that night.

So now I was headed off to a restaurant with a group of people from work and in my mind that place was a swinger’s joint. Nervous? Hell yes!

Fortunately when we walked in there wasn’t really much sign that it was actually a swinger’s place, other perhaps than the photos in the front of the restaurant that referred to some hedonist’s holiday place and the odd little promotional item that one could buy – a pink “Grizzly’s” g-string. We settled in to our seats and I glanced about nervously, noting that there were indeed telephones by all of the tables.

But putting that out of my mind, I focused on the menu. There was a range of different options for the fondue, but only one that truly caught my eye.

Exotic Fondue. A mixture of meats to be cooked and enjoyed. There were a few raised eyebrows as people saw it and a couple of us decided that it had to be tried.
Rattlesnake, Frog’s Leg, Ostrich, Venison, Buffalo, Alligator and Shark. How the hell could I pass that up. Of the lot, I’d only eaten Shark, Buffalo and Venison before. We were sadly informed that they were out of rattlesnake though. We had to put up with mere Python instead.

Of course, as you can probably imagine, most of the discussion centered around whether everything was just going to taste like chicken and I can only gladly say that it didn’t. I would have to say that the alligator was my favourite and that the frog leg and snake were the most disappointing. But heh, at least I can say that I’ve tried them!

And the telephones you ask? How can I not address that further? Well the fact is that the place was set up as a night club in the 60’s and that the owners were in fact swingers. The phones were indeed there to help people get together, but we were assured that no actually swinging (ie sex) had taken place at the establishment itself. It wouldn’t have worried me if it had, after all, I’m sure they’ve washed the tables.

Dec 13, 2008

bah humbug

I have been accused at work recently of being the scrooge, chiefly because of a complaint that I made about the local radio station playing Christmas songs intermittently (hey, we are talking about the 1st of December here).

Well the other night i came home determined not to be Mr Bah Humbug and to get the Christmas tree that had been purchased inside the house so that Caroline and the kids could decorate it. I don't usually participate in this because the excitement that it generates in the kids is usually enough to stress me out and ensure that I ruin it for everyone (maybe I really am the scrooge!).

All was well for a while, up to the point that the tree was formed more like a banana than a nice straight Christmas tree. This meant that although I'd carried it in, sawed off the bottom two inches and tried my damndest, the tree simply wasn't going to stand up straight without further adjustement. And given that it was 10:30 at night, I was covered in sap and had been repeatedly speared by pine needles, I lost it. Bah Humbug. Worst tree ever, cursed six ways to Christmas.

Over the course of Friday I thought about it though and came into the house determined not to ruin the Christmas spirit and see the tree where it belonged; upright, vertical and in the stand.

What I found instead was that Michael and Caroline had beaten me to it and the worst Christmas tree ever was in fact a delightfully bushy, tall marvellous tree.

Right now, it's being decorated. Photos to come.

Dec 12, 2008

not right dammit

I don't care how many times you say it, the forecast HIGH should not be -29C!

Dec 3, 2008

Sins of the Father

Last week was parent teacher interviews for the kids at school, so we trundled along to hear what their teachers would have to say about them. Nothing bad and plenty of good which was lovely. Its an amazing insight into a part of their lives that I otherwise don’t get get a view of.

There was one little piece of the night that cracked me up and I had to note. We were talking to Michael’s science math teacher and she was telling us how Michael usually finished his work early and was quite happy to help some of the students that were struggling with the work, that he was something of a leader in the class. Then she mentioned that if there was one thing that he could work on in the class, it was that he tended to do quite a bit of reading in the class.

Déjà vu! Flash back to year 11 when Mum and Dad came home from a parent teacher interview at school and let me know that my Biology (and home room) teacher had made the observation that if I spent a little more time concentrating on the class and less time reading my books under the desk, then maybe I would be able to better than the mid 80’s I was getting!

Man did I laugh!

3.5

I thought that I’d resolved not to write about the traffic here again, but I can’t help myself. Yesterday afternoon, the wind blew in and with it came the snow. We were all looking outside and thinking that it wasn’t a good sign for the drive home. I made sure that I got out on time to beat the major rush of traffic and thought I was doing well until I hit the gates to the plant. Things got slow after that.

As I made my way across the new overpass to the other side of the highway, things got worse. As I gazed left I saw the big red snake – tail lights being applied repeatedly giving it flashes as of light glancing of its scaled hide. When I looked right it was worse, a stream of white lights filtering down the highway to add to the tail of the snake. And they were moving at a speed that I could have beaten on foot.

I managed to get as far as taking my place in the snake and then moving at a crawl for a hundred or so metres and then came to a complete stop. It had taken me about 30 minutes to make it that far.

TWO HOURS later, we started to move again. Yes, I sat in a line of traffic on that one and only blasted route home for two hours without effectively moving (well other than for the brief moment when we all had to pull onto the shoulder to let an ambulance through).

And of course yesterday was one of those days where I had managed to leave my ipod at home and had to put up with local radio. One channel that I was listening to was supporting International Aids day and so was playing all these depressing songs about that, whilst the other was playing awful crap that at times included Christmas songs. Way to make people want to get out of their cars and shoot someone I tell you!

There’s two hills on the way home from site. You go down the first and up the second. Apparently conditions were so icy on the first of them that trucks were going down all but sideways. So they closed the highway until they could get the sanding trucks out. I’m all for safety, but damn, I sure wish it hadn’t taken 2 hours to sort that mess out. After all, it meant that it only took me three and a half hours for the trip door to door.

And of course there’s that little bit of me that really wanted to experience driving down the icy hill!

76 Trombones (led the big parade)

Last Saturday night it was time for the annual Christmas Pageant in Fort Mac. Now last year it had been held in the morning and it was about -25C outside, so old scrooge here said “Baa Humbug” and didn’t go near it with a 10 foot pole. There was also that minor thing where I knew that I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from comparing it to the Adelaide Pageant. Fair or not, I decided not to put it up to that sort of scrutiny.

This year, it was about -5C outside and at night and so we decided to check it out.

We had a junk food dinner after ringette and then waited in the restaurant until the crowd started to build before making our way outside. We were near the end of the parade route and that meant that it was a good 30-45 minutes before it got as far as us. That was long enough for us all to start feeling the weather, especially the disinterested boys.

But we battled on until finally it arrived. And it was everything that I expected. Kids on trucks with lights and tinsel over them. I guess the best measure of it was the fact that half way through Sam decided he was so cold and it was so boring that he went and sat in the car for the remainder of the parade. The rest of us held out until Santa came by, but probably only just.

That’s probably harsh for what was achieved in a small community, but that’s what I get for being spoiled with the Pageant at home all these years. It was funny talking to the Canadians about how we get into town at 5-6am to reserve a spot, taking lots of sunscreen and floppy hats as we stood in the snow wishing we’d been wearing more layers!

Whoosh

Winter is here again, which means snow on the ground, shoveling the driveway and the sidewalk, freezing all your bits off and of course skiing!

Last weekend the ski hill opened for the first time for the season and we managed to make sure that we all got a little bit of time in on the one run that was open.

Last year we hired skis and equipment for the kids, but this year, after doing a bit of research and financial reasoning, we bought them skis. Discount sales and the fact that we’ll get two years use out of them actually made it more economic. It was interesting to see the varying levels of excitement at having their very own skis.

Michael was keen to get them, though he intends to do more snow-boarding this year (particularly in Fort Mac, saving the skis for our trip to Kimberly …24 days and counting!)

Sam wasn’t really interested at all, just happy to have hired skis because he didn’t really see himself skiing that much (last year he racked up the ‘most minutes spent in the lodge award)

Tom was keen, but thinking about the snowboarding as well and then of course there was Emily, who practically leapt out of her skin at the prospect.

Following the actual purchase of them, Michael was happy, Sam was reservedly happy (they’d not had bindings in stock for the skis that he’d wanted and so he’d settled for a pair the same as Michael’s) Thomas was over the moon because he has twin tipped skis so that he can go backwards easily and Emily was happy as a pig in the proverbial because her skis are pink and purple with flowers on them!.

Saturday was the day to test them all out, so we picked them up from the sports shop with their bindings newly applied and headed off to the ski hill where we had our photos taken for our season passes and took off down the slopes.

It was a success all round. Michael only managed two runs before having to head off to hockey, but was happy with his skis. To my utter astonishment, Sam elected to continue skiing rather than go to Michael’s hockey, a complete change to where things had ended last year.

Thomas was in his element, off jumps and skiing backwards on his second run for the year and after a up and down (as in fall down, stand up) start on her first run, Emily happily made her way down subsequent runs with only one or two falls. Not bad considering the extra length on her skis this year! And she only fell over at the chair and held the entire lift line up once.

In talking with Sam at the end of the day, he was very happy to say that he hadn’t enjoyed it last year because his boots hadn’t been very comfortable and he didn’t like his skis that much, but that this year in his own boots and on his own skis, he’s enjoying it. Yay!

Bring on the big runs!

Nov 24, 2008

Nightmares

About two weeks ago, one lovely morning, I woke up at about 4am and thought that I could hear some odd noises. I waited those few requisite moments for the fog to clear from my skull and concentrated a little harder, trying to ascertain whether it was the sort of noise that one drags their arse out of bed for, or ignores and goes back to sleep. With those moments past, it started to sound suspiciously like the TV was on downstairs, which sadly for me fits into the category of arse-dragging worthiness.

So, having committed myself to the trek, I made my way down stairs to find the little pink think snuggled upon the couch with her pillow and blanket quietly and happily watching TV. I asked what was going on and she let me know that she’d had a scary dream. I asked her what it was about, but with a fevered little shake of her head, informed me that it was too scary to talk about.

I opted for not pursuing it further, rather devoting my energy at that time to getting both her and I back into bed.

With that achieved, I slept through until the alarm went off what seemed to be only moments later. But I didn’t forget. Later I pursued the course of questioning that would ascertain the root cause of the nightmare. When pressed I was informed that it was a “Madagascar dream.” That was both surprising and puzzling so I said, “I thought you liked Madagascar.”

“I only want to see the second one, I don’t like the first one,” I was told. I let her know that next time, rather than go down and turn the TV on that she should come and tell me and let me help her that way instead.

The next couple of weeks passed with out incident until the other night, when at 2am I was awoken by small footsteps advancing toward the bed. Warding off the desire to turn them away sight unseen, I allowed the little girl to climb into my bed for a few moments whilst she calmed down. Once again, scary dreams seemed to be the issue and again, it was too scary to talk about.

Of course, welcoming a small child into one’s bed isn’t ever the comfortable and snuggly experience people sometimes make it out to be. It’s more about elbows and cold feet in disconcerting places and how a 3 foot tall little thing can take up 90% of the available bed space. And as a result of that it was only about 5 minutes later that I was escorting her back to her bed and promising that I would lay down with her for a bit, which was a great promise to make until we reached her bed and I realized that that the last two feet of it was occupied by various toys. This left plenty of room for Em to stretch out, but very little for Daddy.

I only lasted another 5-10 minutes and then I abandoned her to resume sleeping. And thus it was that some 10 minutes after I returned to my bed and attempted to douse the activity that had commenced in my brain I once again heard footsteps. I waited patiently to receive the expected guest but was surprised to find that the footsteps retreated. Retreated, yes, but not back to bed; rather down the stairs and yes, once again I heard the incriminating beep that meant the TV was on. Arse dragging time was back again.

Rather than put her back to bed and face that discomfort, or struggle to accommodate her in my own little night time haven, I pulled her quilt and pillow into my room and had her sleep on the floor beside my bed. That way, when she woke me again, at 4 am, things were a little easier to manage.

And again, the following day I worked to find out just what had been so scary. After much resistance, a quiet and timid little voice gave me just two words.

“Lost Doggy.”

I got dragged out of bed and all over the house and unseemly and ridiculous times of the night for a lost dog? We don’t even own a bloody dog, so it was someone else’s lost dog! Total bastardry, that’s what it was.

The Sky is Falling

I was driving home from work the other night, staring down the highway, quite relaxed because for once there weren’t any traffic problems. Then I saw what appeared to be a shooting star, but in a trajectory that I’d not seen one before.

On the occasions that I’ve been lucky enough to see them previously, they’ve all had a lateral trajectory, paralleling the horizon. This one was distinctly vertical, headed straight for the earth. It was about half way through it’s 2 second appearance that things got really interesting though. At that point, instead of just fading out, it blossomed into an orange fireball that lit up the sky quite significantly.

It was truly amazing and spectacular. And of course there was no one in the car with me for me to be able to say, “Wow, did you see that!?” It was all over the radio the next day and was seen from all over Alberta, but I couldn’t believe that I’d been lucky enough to witness it myself. I just happened to be on a stretch of the highway that was headed directly toward where it fell. Speculation is that pieces of it actually hit the ground and I have to confess to the most fleeting of thoughts as to whether I was witnessing a plane fall from the sky, but they were quickly dismissed.

What I saw appeared to fade from the bloom well above the horizon, certainly more so than this shot, captured on a police car's camera.

Nov 18, 2008

Let the Carnage begin ... or traffic, part um,. what 62 now?

Winter is here and along with winter comes driving in the snow. Fun. Well, it can be. But it can also be a right bastard. This morning was just a reminder of that, though fortunately I wasn’t the object of the lesson.

Since I arrived here last year, I know that I’ve complained almost constantly about the traffic in this single-highwayed town. Well over the last 12 months, with the boom in work up here and the increasing number of projects under development, nothing has happened to ease that pain. The 30km trip is almost guaranteed to take a minimum of 1 hour if you manage to leave the office by 5:10pm. Any later than that and it just gets worse and worse. There are bypasses and over passes and things planned and under construction that will probably make a significant difference … about the time that we manage to get out of here.

This morning, after some snow overnight, someone managed to find the going a little bit more treacherous than usual and came unstuck; overturned in the ditch. Of course, they happened to pick a day when I’d had to stop for gas and so wasn’t as early as I might have been (not that it would have made too much of a difference). It meant that traffic banked up. And when it takes you an hour and 40 minutes to travel the 30kms from your door to the office, you really do wonder why the hell you bother.

And having managed to finally get past the pinch point on the road that was the accident scene, I’d only managed to go another 5kms before there was a second vehicle rolled over in the ditch (this time on the far side of the divided highway as opposed to in the ditch separating the roads. Truly the first day of the winter carnage. I’d like to propose that it be the last as well, but with the combination of weather and driver behaviour that we have up here, I just can’t see it happening.